Dating Violence

About one in three high school students have been or will be involved in an abusive relationship. 40% of teenage girls ages 14-17 years old say they know someone their age who has been hit or beaten by a boyfriend. Women age 16-24 are most vulnerable to intimate partner violence.

Pregnancy increases the risk of violence because the women perceive they have minimal resources, fear that their peers will not be supportive and the abuser uses that fear control her.

Many teens do not realize that they are in a violent relationship because they come from a violent home (see family violence section). Jealous, possessiveness and abuse are common themes of dating violence.

The following questions are designed to help teens identify an abusive relationship:

  • Do you feel nervous around your boyfriend or afraid to disagree with him?
  • Do you change the way to act so your boyfriend doesn't get mad at you?
  • Do you feel pressured into having sex?
  • Does your boyfriend repeatedly call you and ask you where you have been?
  • Does your boyfriend get angry when you pay attention to someone else?
  • Does your boyfriend criticize, insult, or make fun of you when you are alone or in front of other people?
  • Does your boyfriend wrongly accuse you of seeing or flirting with other people?
  • Does your boyfriend stop you from seeing your friends or family or does he stop from doing things that you want to do?
  • Does your boyfriend constantly promise he will change if you give him another chance?
  • Does your boyfriend threaten to kill or hurt you or himself if you break up with him?
  • Does your boyfriend become violent when using drugs or alcohol? Does he pressure you to use them as well?

Warning Signs that someone you know and love is in an abusive relationship:

  • Physical signs of injury
  • Truancy/ Dropping out of school
  • Failing grades
  • Indecisiveness
  • Changes in mood or personality
  • Use of drugs or alcohol
  • Pregnancy
  • Emotional outbursts
  • Isolation
Visit the "Resources" page or call the Jane's Due Process legal hotline at 1-866-www-jane or 1-866-999-5263 for information on how you can get help if you are in an abusive relationship.

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